She knows I will see her. Who she really is. All the beauty and dark and light and mess of it all. She can't bear to look at herself, and she certainly doesn't want me too. The Jesus Spirit in me sees breathtaking glimpses of who she is becoming in Him.
I want to scream: Look up!
"I lift up my eyes to the hills- where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth."
The road Home is long. Doesn't a journey always seem longer when you don't know exactly where you are going? Sometimes shortcuts seem a needed break from the repetitive step by step by faithful step . It's easy to think "just a little resting of my weary soul here.... then I'll move on." But we are creatures of comfort.
And we are made to be comforted by Love.
"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God."
~2 Corinthians 1:3-5
But true Comfort and true Love has been so deeply misunderstood that we crucified Him as the enemy. We crucify Him still. And sometimes we crucify those who look like Him and talk like Him and love like Him.
I am wounded and I wound her too. I hope that someday she will see that the wounds of a sister can be trusted, it is an enemy that multiplies kisses.
It hurts. But open rebuke is better than hidden love. And I love her so much!